Are you familiar with this group called “Cleveland Scene” something or other? Me neither.
But they got my attention when they started going crazy on social media promoting their Pig and Whiskey 2014 event.
You know how to how to get a Virginia girl’s attention!
Here’s how to elite-hack this event for free drinks, if your heart so desires.
(Yeah yeah, the event is completely “free” already, you just have to buy drink tickets and pay for the actual BBQ from vendors. But walking around is free! Promise!)
(OK fine, I guess they do have music there you can listen to for free. But just sayin’. It’s called “Pig and Whiskey” not “Music and oh yeah food and liquor too if you want it.” If you want the free drink part, read on!)
Volunteer a mere four hours of your Saturday afternoon that you usually use for just sleeping in or watching reruns or *yawn* studying.
And then you gets drink tickets.
Yeah, you still have to buy your own barbecue, but I guess you can’t have everything.
Maybe you can trade a couple of drink tickets for some grub?
At any rate.
Alright Cleveland and NEO in general.
I see your barbecue party, and I raise you cutting the meat straight off a roasting pig.
Oops, should have warned vegetarians and PETA people to stop reading.
Hey vegetarians and PETA people! Don’t read the next two sentences!
Did you know that once a pig is old enough to kill, you want to because they are so darn mean? Also, barbecued pig is delicious. Also (OK so I should have said the next three sentences), roasting a full pig with the head sitting there is kind of a tradition. I realize it sounds barbaric to the sensitive types, but it’s SO FLIPPIN’ GOOD.
Back to my original point.
You should totally volunteer with me this Saturday at the Cleveland Scene’s inaugural Pig and Whiskey event so we can enjoy some whiskey & bourbon & scotch samples whilst listening to music and I assume catching some quality vitamin D.